What Is Being Stirred Up Within You?
I’ve been at a bit of a crossroads lately. I spent so much time and energy working towards the launch of KickLighter with all of the new ideas I want to unravel with it, yet I’ve been finding myself lacking the focus and drive to know where I want to put my energy at the moment.
I’ve been finding that the way I’ve been approaching my business isn’t working for me or exciting me anymore. I am not wanting to be on social media, I’m taking another look at the way others can work with me, and at times I wonder what’s the point of even trying to build this anymore.
Then I realized that KickLighter is a business that kickstarts our inner light. It asks us to be comfortable with the uncomfortable process of finding or remembering our passions. Why I thought I would be exempt from this is quite hilarious actually because it’s an ever evolving process as we continue to expand on the gifts and desires we have. The vision I had for my business even last year has completely changed as I find myself in a brand new environment with a whole new community, and new opportunities.
So I write to you today with mixed feelings because I put pressure on myself to write something inspiring and meaningful yet that’s not always reality. Sometimes we have to sit and wait for the next evolution of our lives to reveal themselves. I’m uncomfortable even writing something that doesn’t portray that I have all the things figured out in life on this personal growth journey. I sit here with everything I’ve known fallen away with a blank canvas sitting in front of me asking what paint brushes, colors, and image I want to create with next. What are the feelings I want evoked from this new painting of my life? What is the next level of light that is being kicked on and stirred up within me?
I’ve had many conversations with people lately who seem to be finding themselves in similar places. Transition - the in between phase of what no longer was but what hasn’t fully formed yet. There’s no timeline on how long this phase may last for each of us. There may be options and ideas that lie in front of us with none fully lighting us up therefore confused on what we ‘should be doing’ to keep making productive forward progress. And yet, for me, I know I’m being asked to stop, pause, and say no to anything that doesn’t fully light me up at the moment.
Is there fear around taking this approach? Absolutely. Is there anger that things aren’t where I want them to be? You betcha. Is there a quiet voice deep within that feels relief that I’m starting to give myself permission to be okay with everything looking completely different? Yes. Yes there is. And that’s the voice I want to listen to right now, even though it may make no sense to anyone or even what society would approve of.
The process of kicking our inner light on is not always glamorous or fun or easy. It can be often uncomfortable and filled with experiencing a myriad of emotions. Yet it’s engaging us on new levels with ourselves, our motivating factors, and lighting up our passions where we know we’ll be unstoppable around.
Until then, if you feel called to, let yourself rest, take in all that you’ve currently been doing, and create some space for what new wants to channel through you to come into your life.